7 Wrong Reasons for Joining Sister Wives Dating

Jul 5 '2021, 3:58 PM | By Chris

Joining a sister wife dating website can be nerve-wracking. If your heart and mind are in it for the right reasons, the process is more likely to go smoothly. However, we are still human and can be pushed to make some questionable decisions.

I’ve covered a list of the seven common reasons why people join sister wives dating sites--the wrong reasons. Let’s go over them in detail.

You want to save the relationship by “spicing things up”

This is by far one of the most common reasons most people try polyamory and polygamy in general. When a monogamous relationship takes a rocky turn, one or both people in the relationship might think it a good idea to try polygamy or polyamory. This might be detrimental overall.

Resorting to finding a sister wife in a desperate attempt to bring excitement into the relationship is a sign that the partners want to avoid facing the actual problems in their union. This Band-Aid solution rarely works and highlights the importance of proper communication--monogamous relationship or not.

You just want to make your partner happy

In the same vein, if your partner wants to experiment, and you don’t want to jeopardize your relationship by objecting, then you might just be saying “Yes” for the sake of avoiding confrontation. It is a hard pill to swallow, but sometimes we are not compatible with our partners--whether we’ve been with them for one year or a decade.

If your partner is adamant about trying polyamory or finding a sister wife, and you know in your heart that you are a pure monogamist, then you must tell them. Holding onto uncomfortable feelings can lead to resentment down the road. This only means lost time on both ends.

You’re sexually unsatisfied in your current relationship

Polygamy and polyamory as a whole are oversexualized. The average reader might think about orgies, multiple sexual partners, and other X-rated images when the term polygamous relationship comes up. In fact, poly couples likely engage in the same sexual activities as monogamist couples do.

Yes, group sex is a thing, and multiple partner arrangements exist, but media has demonized poly relationships on the sexual front. In reality, most poly relationships are calculated and are not full of risks.

If you or your partner wants to join sister wives dating sites for the sake of sexual satisfaction, then sister wives dating sites might not be for you. You might step back and think about what you need from your current partner and try out some possible solutions before expecting other people to provide the answer.

You expect relationships without full commitment

Poly relationships are portrayed as lax, indulgent, and casual. However, poly relationships (polygamous relationships, more specifically) are often committed. There’s no other way to be when you’re uniting multiple lives into a single thread.

While people might regard all poly relationships as uncommitted, this simply isn’t true. If you’re joining sister wives dating sites with this mindset, then you might be up for a rough wake-up call. Of course, not everyone is looking for something permanent and serious, but many people on sister wives dating sites are.

You want an excuse to be intimate with other people

Another common reason for people to join poly dating sites is to avoid the consequences of being intimate with others. This unhealthy reason helps give polyamory and polygamy a bad name because it ascribes a promiscuous attribute to consensual non-monogamy. In reality, people in poly relationships are meticulous about who they welcome into their lives and into their bedrooms.

Whether you’re a single person who wants to be with multiple people but balks at the idea of your partner being with someone else or a couple who finds the idea of a metamour thrilling, but in reality, crumble at the slightest sign of jealousy, the poly lifestyle should not be an excuse to experience extra-relationship intimacy minus the consequences.

You’re afraid of being alone

Moreover, you should not be on sister wives dating sites if you’re simply afraid of being alone. This rings true for anyone who doesn’t want to grow old alone and for any divorced person who thinks they’re increasing their odds of finding a relationship by trying the poly lifestyle.

You’re not only doing yourself a disservice by being honest with yourself, but you might be wasting your time, too. Most genuine polyamorists and polygamists can sniff out imposters a mile away.

You’re looking for extra financial help

Similarly, if you’re a divorced person with kids or a person who was not financially independent while in your previous relationship, don’t look to poly dating sites for an easy fix. Financial assistance is an immoral reason for turning to sister wives dating sites, and should only be considered a bonus when entering a poly relationship.

Misleading another person or people into a dishonest relationship cannot end well for anyone involved. Instead, ask for help where you can (friends, family, professional assistance), and work hard to get yourself where you need to be in good financial standing.

How do I know if a poly relationship is right for me?

There are many benefits to poly relationships, but these are not the reasons for joining one. Instead, ask yourself if you can handle the stressors in a poly relationship (namely jealousy and resource management), whether you want to enter a poly relationship or you feel pressured to do so, and why you want to be in a poly relationship.

If you can answer truthfully and are satisfied with your self-reflection, then it might be time to take the next step. Joining a poly dating site can feel intimidating, but it can also feel liberating. You’re a step closer to being your authentic self, and if you need clarification on the ever-growing list of poly terms, check out our poly terms and conditions article for the most recent insight.