Sister Wives’ Christine Confronts Husband Kody

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The show’s seventeenth season premieres on September 11, but a sneak peek shows fans what’s to come. In the season preview, Christine Brown faces off with now ex-husband Kody about why he doesn’t want to pursuit divorce. Her questions come after years of no intimacy and repeated offenses on Kody’s side. The season hasn’t premiered yet, and already, the drama is stirring up fans’ emotions.

Why did Christine leave Kody?

In November 2021, Christine and Kody’s 25-year-marriage ended. In Season 17, fans will discover how and why.

The newest mini clip reveals Christine asking Kody why he doesn’t want to let go of their union despite their lack of intimacy and dysfunctional relationship. She claims that of the 800 days she had lived in Arizona (she has since moved to Utah), Kody had only spent three full days with her and their shared kids.

Exasperated, Christine addresses the camera during a confessional, appealing for Kody to “Man the f—k up.” She implores Kody to be honest with her about the possibility of divorce.

Why do unhappy couples stay together or stay married?

It’s common to see partners stay together despite being deeply unhappy. This may be due to the interdependence theory or the idea that a partner will not leave a relationship if they perceive that the benefits outweigh the costs. Let’s review other factors that affect or compound this theory.

Fear of change

As children, we develop different attachment styles (of which there are four) that later develop into relationship styles. This is influenced by our early interactions with our parents or primary caregiver. About 20% of people develop an anxious attachment style.

People with this attachment style feel uncomfortable and scared when separated from their partner because their parents were unavailable or emotionally unpredictable throughout. Married people with an anxious attachment style are more likely to stay in a dissatisfied relationship regardless of their happiness. To them, the relationship centers on a fear of abandonment and insecurity.

Beyond attachment theory, many people fear the changes that divorce would bring, not just for themselves, but for their children and family. For example, a sister wife may not want to uproot her life away from their village, especially if she does not have family or friends elsewhere. This network is crucial for childcare, emotional, and social support.

Pooled resources

A more practical reason exists for staying in an unhappy marriage, too. Many people stay with their partners because they do not want to or cannot incur the costs of childcare and/or living expenses alone. When a sister wife wants to leave a marriage, it may not be feasible if she is a stay-at-home parent or is only working part-time.

Social expectations

In many cultures, marriage is expected when someone reaches their mid-twenties or early thirties. This expectation can deter many people from leaving a dissatisfying marriage, especially if it means they will be single parents or co-parents as a consequence. There’s a stigma surrounding single parenthood, and many people tough it out until children reach adulthood before parting ways.

Religious beliefs

Divorce is discouraged in many major religions, especially inside Catholic and Christian communities where married partners may feel a pressure to stay together for the sake of honoring a holy doctrine. In the Church of Latter-Day Saints and Mormonism, a legal divorce is allowed, but couples must also cancel a temple sealing if they were married in a temple.

How do you approach a marriage problem?

According to the CDC, every 2.3 couples of 1,000 get a divorce. According to an article by The Royal Society Publishing, households with three or more wives have higher instances of divorce due to co-wife conflict, on top of wife-husband struggles.

Divorce is the result of a breaking point. Before a sister wife or husband reaches this decision, there are ways to address marriage problems that result in a strengthened bond.

Be honest

It’s strange. Sometimes, we’re closed off to the people we are supposed to share everything with. In the Sister Wives Season 17 sneak peek, Christine confesses that she’s not very close to sister wives Robyn and Meri, which is a surprising fact given that she’s been part of the family for over two decades. She also raises the question of Kody being cowardly by not talking to her openly about divorce.

Dishonesty or holding back information only leads to mistrust. On the other hand, honesty paves the way to compassion and understanding. Without these values, conversations end in more arguments, confusion, and miscommunication.

Shift mindset from “me” to “we”

When we’re upset, it’s easy to blame, deflect, and retaliate. Using “I” statements instead of “you” statements redirects the conversation from accusatory to earnest. Voice your feelings honestly, but remember that it’s you and your spouse against the problem not you against each other.

In the sneak peek video from Sister Wives, Kody and Christine make repeated “You” statements. The argument escalates, when the intent is to have a fruitful conversation.

Discuss issues and come up with solutions together

One of the biggest gripes fans have with Kody is that he seems to make decisions without consulting everyone in the family—and without considering their input with genuine care. Working as a team takes care of practical challenges and strengthens the bond between sister wife and husband.

Teamwork also makes every person in the household feel seen and valuled. Otherwise, insecurity can create even more problems in a marriage.

Show up to difficult conversations with love

Long-term relationships and marriages breed familiarity, and as the saying goes, familiarity breeds contempt. This isn’t—and shouldn’t be—always the case, though. Instead of approaching disagreements with a defensive and combative attitude, show up with love and compassion.

Be eager to truly understand why the other person feels the way they feel, and listen without feeling the need to defend yourself or prescribe a solution for the both of you.

Spoiler alert: Christine and Kody split up

Although it’s too late for Christine and Kody, whose divorce we’ll get to see play out in Season 17 of Sister Wives, there’s still hope for other marriages. If you’re going through a rough patch in your marriage, the best time to make your amends is now. Marriage is rarely easy, but when we put in the work, we can build a loving, respectful, beautiful partnership that lasts.

Published By: Sister Wives 

Matchmakers Inc